How to Ride in a Matatu when you are a Muzugu

So  last Sunday, I braved the rain with my friend Loise and we went to Nairobi for church via Matatu. Matatu-es are a vast mini bus system that spans East Africa. The mini buses are privately owned and when you are muzugu (white person) in East Africa you are told many, many horror stories of traffic accidents, muggings and general mayhem in whatever sort of orientation/mentor/etc you have prior to coming. However, they are the staple form of transport here and I trust my Kenyan friends and wanted to go to church with them. 

We took a private car of a friend of Loise that took us far as the top of the mountain up at the junction where the Nairobi road joins in with the partly paved road to Kijabe. It was pouring and we stood in a little hut that was built from sticks, traps and mazie sacks and waiting for a Matatu to come by. They did. I had my forearm crutch. My knee is nearly cured but I have been very protective of it and tend to take the crutch for anywhere longer than a little bit outside of my house. Although I can walk without it just find now and around the hospital forget where I leave it hourly. Anyway, everyone in the Matatu was pointing and gawking at the muzugu with the crutch and saying that I was sick so they gave us the front seat.   

Step 1: Front SEAT!!! The most coveted spot: Seat belt, leg room and less vibrations.  (use whatever means possible including possibly masquerading as a “sick person” ;) )

Step 2: Put on the seat belt, pull it tight. 

They tried to over charge us because I was a muzugu but my fearless friend Loise told them NO and paid the normal fare.

Step 3: Know what the fare should be prior to boarding.

Step 4: Praying is helpful.

Step 5: Prepare yourself for frequent stops and breaking to pick up people along the road.

Step 6: Prepare for the general Kenyan driving adventure of avoiding pot holes. 

Joking aside, it actually was fine especially up in the front. We arrived safely, walked around the U of Nairobi area, Central Park and then went up to church. The sermon was excellent and the worship was nice.  We spent the afternoon with my friend Jackie, who is a pediatric resident at Kenyatta the national hospital here in Kenya. We watched Kenyan soap operas and lounged around and chatted.  Then we went shopping and then we went to the Matatu stand. 

The front seat was taken. So we got in the back.  More and more people came. We hit capacity. So I thought my knee was cured but unfortunately when you stuff it in a very small contorted position with groceries, it is NOT cured. It was hot, crowded, there crying babies and very loud Rap music. 

Step 7: Distraction is key, I counted 15 donkeys on the way home.

Step 8: Showers are nice afterwards.

Step 9:  Its really not that bad, it reminds of riding the trams in Bucharest on a hot day or even the subway in NYC. 

In the End we were home safe and sound with all our stuff and my knee has fully recovered.